One Year Since Referral

Dear Vivi -

One year ago today, we got a phone call that changed our lives, and saw this picture for the first time:

It was such an amazing thing for Daddy and I to sit down and open up the email together.  We had an immediate reaction to you, and I think we knew right away, although we didn't formally admit it to each other or CCAI until four days later, that you were our daughter.  But what we didn't know was just how far we could fall in love with you in such a short period of time. This is that same sweet face today:

Over the course of the last year, you have drastically altered our lives in such profound and irreversible ways.  We now know:

• what it's like to have a little girl in the house to balance out our boys adding dresses and pigtails to our polo shirts and buzzcuts.
• that girls yell just as loud as boys, if not louder.
• what it feels like to have a daughter.
• what it means to welcome a child who is "not flesh of our flesh, nor bone of our bone, but still miraculously our own."
• that having three children is a whole new level of crazy.
• what it feels like to struggle to bring a child home.
• that you were undoubtedly prepared for us just as we were preparing for you.
• that your smile is priceless.
• that we can love a child that we did not bear as much as those we did.
• that you are just the most smiley, squishy, sassy, sunshiney, scrumptious, and sweet little girl in the world, and absolutely the perfect addition to our family. There is no way this could have happened without God working through every step.

We have a long road ahead of us.  We know that there are some challenges ahead of us physically, and we are still getting to know you emotionally, bonding with you.  But we have no doubt that we can deal with it all together head on and it will all work out for the good.

We knew it from the first time we saw that precious face, and we know it just as much now that you are home.

Love,
Mommy & Daddy

One Month at Home

Dear Vivi -

Tomorrow, January 13, marks one month of having you home with us. One month. 31 days. 44,640 minutes.  We can count a lot of things that have happened since you became a Black, but some things you can't count.

Like the number of fun times with two new brothers who still adore their sister - except when she interrupts them playing their Nintendo DS's.

The number of times you look straight at the camera and yell, "Cheese!" with that beautiful smile of yours.

The number of times you've grabbed a backpack or other accessories to spruce yourself up just so you look your best when you're hanging out at home.

The number of times that you've brought us joy, including when you play the drums,

 discover new toys,

 

learn how to feed yourself breakfast while rocking crazy bedhead hair,

or the number of times you've just made yourself at home like you've been here forever. 

Let me tell you a thing about adoption, sweet Vivi. It's a long road.  There are days when we felt like this:

 A lot.  Because there's so much to do, so many things to check off the list, so many long days and weeks and months of waiting. Just waiting.  And dying a little inside every day that we know about you and don't have you in our arms.  Loving a picture can never be compared to loving a person, but boy did we love you from far away.  And then one day, all the waiting was over and there you were - squishy, giggly, loud, expressive, determined you.

We fell in love all over again, this time with the real you.  And sometimes we catch ourselves just looking at you.  Even after more than 2,600,000 seconds with you, we sometimes can't believe you're really here with us.  Forever.

But wow, are we grateful.

And wow, were you worth each and every little thing we had to do to get you home.  Now we begin to live into our new life, the new normal that you have brought with you.  It's amazing that we never realized how much we needed a new one until you came along to change everything.

Love,
Mommy & Daddy

One Month With Vivi

Dear Vivi -

It seems as though we're always traveling on what are our anniversary days with you.  On January 2, we celebrated one month of being with you.  Instead of a little party, we spent it in the car, going 12 of the 17 hours we needed to in order to get home from Pennsylvania, where we spent our first Christmas together as a family of five.

Our first month with you has been a whirlwind, to say the least. You are such a trouper.  Coming home in the middle of the Christmas season is rough.  There's so much going on and, with two brothers who are already so excited about everything, we jumped right in when we got back.

We headed to Christmas Lane so the boys could ride the train (you don't have much interest yet) and we could see the lights and decorations. Oh, and we began the agony that families with three and more children know: the agony of getting them all to look at the camera and smile at the same time. I seemed to be able to get your brothers to take a decent picture now and again.  I have yet to get one of the three of you.  But I'll keep trying!

We hung out at home, waiting for Micah to get off the bus, and tried to establish some sort of routine despite our jet lag.

We decided before we left for China that we were going to try and make the annual trip to Pennsylvania this year.  It's something we do every year, although we usually are hopping on a plane early Christmas day afternoon, in order to get to Pittsburgh for dinner. 

This year, because both Mommy and Daddy were still off from work, we decided to drive so that we could take our time and not rush.  It was the right decision; it was also a really long drive.  But we made it, and  got to partake in things that we haven't done outside of our immediate family since moving to Florida.

You made Christmas cookies with Aunt Heidi.

We dressed like the Steelers fans we are and hung out with cousin Tyson.

We went to Christmas Eve service at Mommy's home church, and managed to this attempt at a picture with you all dressed up when we got home. Sadly it was the best of the bunch even with you staring into space and Micah making a weird face...

...this was an outtake.

But on your own, you're pretty cute!

Sadly, we really didn't have any boots for you to wear that were snow-appropriate. So you had to watch your brothers romp without you.  Next year you'll have boots and be playing with them, I promise!

You recovered though, and managed to find Liam absolutely hysterical.

You were pretty funny yourself.  Did you spend time in the 'hood before we knew you?

We hung out for a bit on New Year's with some friends.  Our families have grown over the years and it's so much fun to get together.  Well, you aren't so sure in this picture.  Trust us when we say that you actually had a really good time at the party.

You don't even like hanging out with your own family!

But you totally have the hang of photo-bombing and think that's, well, the bomb. Way more fun than posing.

You came through for one photo though. Thank you!

And we had a little fun together.

You had fun all on your own - only sunglasses needed.

When we got back, you took your first trip to the Magic Kingdom.  We did it mainly because your brothers and Daddy and I were desperate to walk around for a while after riding in the car for two straight days.

You fake-played your first video game.

You for-real played your first video game which was a bulldozer ride, in the tradition of your brothers.

You rode "The Little Mermaid" with Daddy and Liam.

Here's what we know about you after being with you for the last month:

• You do NOT like to have your picture taken with anyone else.  I submit as evidence every group picture in this letter.
• You are a champion sleeper.  If we're totally honest, I think that Daddy and I were a little worried about this one.  Micah is a great sleeper, but Liam's still working on it after 4 1/2 years, and we had no idea what to expect with you.  You're fantastic. Naps, sleeping all night, you're great all around.
• As good as you are at sleeping, you're an even better eater.  You eat just about everything that's put in front of you. That includes veggies, fruits, pastas, desserts, rices, meats, desserts, cereal, potatoes, breads, and desserts.  You're an adventurous eater.
• You are fun.  You're just fun.  You have a great spirit about you.  Your wheezy laugh is infectious and it comes up at the most unexpected times.  So delightful.
• You like things how you like them, when you like them.  It's clear that you have been the baby of the household, not used to dealing with other children close in age to you.  You want your brothers around until you don't want them around - and then you don't want them around NOW. Or sooner.  We're teaching them how to respond to you.
• You don't like the dogs.  We're teaching you how to respond to them.  While we think this is just a product of never having lived with dogs or had much interaction with them, we are working on building a respectful relationship between you and the dogs that you just want to lick you all over and be your best friend for life.
• You want to walk everywhere.  We've mentioned this before and we'll mention it again.  You seem to be afraid of the walker toy that you got for Christmas, so we can't wait to get you in to physical therapy and get to the bottom of your issues so we can see you get around on your own because you so desperately want to do it.
• You are the perfect complement to our family.  God knew exactly what he was doing when he placed you with us.

Here's to the next 900 months together.  We can't wait to see you become even more you.

Love,
Mommy & Daddy